Sometimes I keep wondering,what is it that is driving us to do a thing and not do a thing? But I am sure many will come up with the answer "happiness".But I would say that what we actually want from life is "contentment" and feeling of completeness. This alone opens the key of happiness. But the question is when do we feel content? i.e. when can you say confidently that "Ah,today every thing happened the way I wanted" . So what leads to contentment is "being in control". I know this sounds like maths and set theory :). How is this possible? This is possible only when we maintain a symbiotic relation with the environment (which includes our family,our work place and the society in general and of course the present circumstances) we are living in.
Whatever day to day decisions we take if we take them keeping the rest of the environment in mind then we will be happy.But if the decisions taken are with half heart then you will not feel happy and content. For instance if we wanted one kind of movie and your friend wants to see another.And somehow she manages to take you to her choice of movie if you go grudgingly than you will not be content at the end of the day. But if we build our personality in such a way that we learn to accept small oppositions with complete heart and not fuss over it then your contentment quotient will definitely rise. If we refuse to change ourselves even for a small thing then we will end up with more bitterness and discontentment. Its better to use our judgement in these kind of cases,by asking ourselves this question " By giving into the other person ,am I jeopardizing my personality and life in anyway?".If your heart tells you "No" then you will accept the decision with complete heart. But remember that life is too short to grudge and fret over silly things.Think long term always.
But sometimes we come to a state which you can call a "crossroad" state. This is the state in which where you go determines your coming future and may entirely change your life. That state we all go through while picking up our careers,switching careers/giving up a career/getting married/ becoming a parent/buying a house /investment involving risk etc. But for these decisions our complete approval of heart is a MUST. If go in one way and finally regret it then nothing can be worse than that. You suffer and you contentment quotient comes down and so does your happiness.While taking these decisions it is very important to understand how your path will impact you and your environment. If we only think of only ourselves and forget the environment than it will lead to conflicts and confusion. Its very important that the whole environment is in the same page as you before you go ahead. The symbiosis is the key.
But there is another case where after you have taken your decision and have gone ahead with it ,you realize that things are actually not going as smoothly as you anticipated.Then what to do? Then place yourself at "crossroads" again and revisit the decision once more. Sometimes life is not about YOU always .We need to consider people around us .But if you mind is clear about the decision you made in the first place and still people around you are not cooperating with you , plan your path in a way as to not involve those who are not interested in your path . I know it is not that simple. But life is all about workaround isn't it?
There are thousand ways to reach a place but what path you choose makes all the difference to your life. Its good to concentrate on the path rather than the goal. Because after you have reached your goal with no symbiosis then there will be no one around you to appreciate it and will that give you happiness?