Polarised world

What we are witnessing today is a our constant movement towards polarisation. The whole world is forming its own groups and fighting with the other group. There is "your religion" vs " my religion group" , there is "liberals" vs "conservative" group , there "straight" vs "LGBT" group , there is "Humans" vs "Nature supporter" group , there is "Humans" vs" Animals supporter" group , there is "East" vs "West" group , there "White" vs"Black,Brown etc.." group . In our country we have something like this:
"Your caste" vs "My caste"
"Northies" vs "Southeis"
"North-East" vs  " Rest of India"
"Modi" vs "Anti-Modi"
"Bollywood stars" vs "Social-media group"

The list is never -ending. What is the surprising part is that everybody will belong to every group! Even if we don't people around you will make sure that you take sides. If we draw a venn diagram of the above then we will find something like this :

How do you feel seeing this diagram?  Confused? Frustrated?   Well this is how I am feeling right now? 

What have we all turned to?  Everyday we are all pushing ourselves away from few good virtues which can save this humanity right now.  The moral stories we learnt through Panchatantra, Jataka tales seem stupid right now but they are what we need . We need our moral virtues back. We need  virtues like helping others in need, treating others with humility and being good.

The need of the hour is that we all STOP expressing ourselves and START LISTENING to others.  Start treating others with compassion, show empathy , try to do some good. If the other person is not willing to take your compassion then it his bad luck. Dont get polarised with that. Stick to your virtues always. Be persistent like Gandhi , who stuck to his non-violent vision for almost 50 years!  Dont get carried away by "instant-high" gratifications . Dont get swayed by polarised world and most importantly dont lose hope! If nothing works , just keep doing your duty and fulfill everything that is required for your loved ones. This is enough. There is no need to change the society. At least you wont be tarnishing it.

Eternal Fight for woman

Woman had always to fight and she is continuing to do so. Unfortunately ,  I feel , the fight in olden days was with the society. Now the conflict is with herself! In olden times , the pattern was set. Man worked, woman stayed at home and took care of the house and the kids. Please note these works cannot be avoided. They have to be done , if we want a family.  So till our mother's generation , it was natural that it was our own moms who opened the door when we came home. Nothing seemed wrong with that.  The thought that a mother should work never crossed her mind. She already thought her life was meaningful because she was taking care of the ENTIRE house. Not a easy task , right?

Then the trend changed , Western ideas made us realise that woman also should work like men . Our generation , did everything possible to study well and get placed into a good company. It all worked out till we got married and had children.

The one thing which never changed was , taking care of a kid is something ,STILL needs to be done. Even if we are earning lakhs per month.  A strong family support , who would offer to take care of the kid is a welcome decision. Even day care centres are there to help you with that option . A live in maid is another option we can consider. All these are there so that the needs of the child /baby can be taken care of , when both husband and wife can work peacefully at work without any tension . 

But there is another option as well. The option is that , either of the parent decides to QUIT his/her job, stay back home and decide to take care of the baby. Is something wrong with this option? The parents choose to be next to their child, whom they gave birth to and watch her grow. Give the child environment where values and outlook towards life is what they think of(after all the child is theirs) . Is something wrong with this option? The answer is no . 

BUT , why do people ask if they are "working" ? How do we define work anyway? What I can make of the question is , does your job pay?  Taking care of the house and kids doesn't pay. You are right. But is getting paid the only thing which can make a person independent? We never asked out mothers. But why now?  

Also I never ask anybody what they are upto in life in a judgmental way.  I wish everyone else also stopped. Each person in this world has different priorities in life, different aspirations, different ideologies, different idea about how to lead their lives.  And today , I may not go for a paid job, but tomorrow I may change my mind. It is going to be a decision , which my family will take and nobody else.If the family as a whole is able to do that symbiotically  then it is good for that family. Why should any outsider, article writers, woman empowerment ladies  tell me what I should do.

What the world needs desperately at the moment is PEACE. And that is what we all should work for. Whatever it takes. A peaceful family will automatically have a cumulative effect on the country and generate peace.

Five standouts from Hampi

Hampi is one place ,which has fascinated me for a long long time. I always wanted to visit it. Mainly because of my interest in historical places. But Hampi being the World Heritage site (UNESCO) made me feel even more inclined to visit it. After the visiting the place I can only say that I was stumped,bowled ,awestruck and enriched. What a PLACE!  The travel story of Hampi I would like to  write it in a separate piece. Here I would mention some standouts from the place which I found quiet unusual considering its rich history and monuments. 

1. The place is absolutely isolated and virginal : Yes, the world heritage site is isolated. The place is 4 km from Hospete , the main town nearest to Hampi. The civilization is quiet sparse and even the Hampi village is very small. And all this is a plus point! You will find yourself in between huge boulders of rocks and hillocks , with thousands of monuments scattered . You would be confused to figure out , where to start first. The ASI does make our life easier with the Hampi map(found everywhere!) . Using the map , you can navigate through Hampi like a treasure hunt in Amazing race contest.  But it is not so easy as you think. We need a guide to help us through the map and places.

2. The place is STILL NOT commercial: Yes , this I found shocking. Because in India , anything "touristy" is definitely a place for business.There are so many monuments in Hampi and yet there are no shops (not many at least) , apart from the cucumber  seller and ice-cream seller near them. The shopping street is not even 100 meters and the souvenirs are not remotely connected to Hampi. There are lots of dresses(which we can find all over India), jute bags(found everywhere)  and brass items. The only souvenir to take home were the Vijayanagara Empire's coins , which are collected from the basin of Tungabhadra river (when the water recedes during summer). No fridge magnets shaped like the chariots, no Virupaksha temple picture, no three headed Nandi statue. Nothing. Hampi could earn so much more but for some unknown reason it is not the case.

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3. Food : Hampi is  visited by many foreign tourists as well as Indian tourists and yet the food options available is quiet meager.  We ate at a place called Mango Tree , where the meal was decent enough but nothing great to talk about. The eateries  are also very small. That's why I saw many families actually get their own food and eat on the lawns of Lotus Mahal or Queen's Bath! 

4.  The main transport is a auto or cycle !: In Hampi, the best transport used is cycle or auto. You can see whole of Hampi by hopping onto an auto and asking the driver to take you to places. You can easily get an auto driver's number at the Hospete bus stand.  There will be many touts eager to share their number. You choose one of them and call him wherever you are! The other way is by cycling. This is a favorite option for the foreign tourists(considering their fitness levels) . A map in hand, water and a cycle  and you are ready to conquer Hampi with two wheels and a pedal! The best part about cycling is , you can stop anywhere you want and take how much even time you want , to see the place. 

5.  You need a lifetime to understand and visit whole of Hampi: Yes , this is correct. Hampi is a civilization on its own. It is like exploring a city with thousands of landmarks. Every monument has its own story and its own identity.  You will not feel like leaving any one of them.  The monuments are so many that even ASI have given up. There are some monuments lying in neglect , hidden in some corner(like the Achuytaraya temple , Varaha temple)  and ASI has not done anything to highlight it. I don't blame them. They are simply too many. You will know what I mean when you visit Hampi. 

There are so many more , but whatever is the case, Hampi is one place I will always cherish. The guide told us one interesting thing. He told us that he always thanks the Vijayanagar empire because their foundation in stone in Hampi is still feeding the current generation's stomachs. What a profound truth indeed.

Unit 4: Journal Writing

 Module 1 : Writing Activity

I live in Bangalore , which is known as silicon valley of India, situated in South India's state of Karnataka. My husband , who is a software developer, moved to Bangalore around 1999. Because of its weather, it is also called as post retirement haven. The city , which is ideally situated on a higher plane,  has pleasant weather  throughout the year, making it a people friendly place. The place is full  of gardens , which are usually lush green , and parks. Although the river Cauvery is situated at a some distance , it still is used to supply water to whole of Bangalore. Because of these reasons , Bangalore is one of the best cities of India.


Module 2 : Writing activity .

My place , a beautiful garden city, does have its own disadvantages. My home , down south next to a highway,  is particularly prone to pollution and noise from traffic. Fully armored with mask , I have to leave my home to avoid the pollution .My eyes constantly looking out for errant traffic, tread carefully on the road.  My apartment facing the other side of the road, thankfully escapes the pollution to a large extent. Crossing the highway is another headache. To cross the road, I have to wait almost ten minutes. Exhausted by this entire process, I sometimes avoid going out entirely. Going at this rate, I may soon start suffering from Vitamin D deficiency :).

Unit 3 Journal writing

Module 1 : Writing Subjects
1. Gayatri went to the shopping mall today.

2. Shopping is one activity she enjoys.

3.  To walk in a shopping mall is a therapeutic activity for most of them.

4. Louis Vutton store is also  part of the mall.

5. Children love playing in  a mall.



1. . She shopped for handbag in a shop.

2..  Everyone  especially woman love shopping.

3.  Who doesn't want to buy new clothes?


Module 2 : Writing action verbs

1. I shopped to hear's content.

2. The kids ran here and there in the mall.

3. The shops glittered with lights.

4. The escalator rode  quite fast.

FountainHead - Over my head

As a literature student and a general reader , I had heard a lot about FountainHead.  All the bigshots of the world had this single book as their favorite. To quench my thirst I decided to buy the book and keep it in my bookshelf.  I was so damn intimidated by its sheer size that I refused to touch it! After ten years of buying the book  I finally mustered the courage to read the book.

I truly enjoyed the first few chapters. Howard Stoark really impressed me. Here was a man who knew everything ! He was like God. He was indifferent to everybody . He chose his college, he chose whom he will work for and he decided what he will build.  He wanted a client who will listen to HIM. The client has to live in the house Howard builds.  There are no two ways about it.

There is of course the second character , Peter Keating. He will do anything to go on the top. He will listen to people and build a house according to the client's needs. He will agree to work under a person (Francon) so that he can climb up the ladder. He will even kill a person to claim stake in the company. He will two time his girlfriend  and be oh-so-cool about it. The girlfriend is like doormat who is ok  with everything. She is ok if Peter doesnt visit her for months. She is ok if he agrees to marry her and then says that he wont marry her. She is OK with EVERYTHING! She doesn;t get angry at all!

Then there is a uncle of the girl Elsworth Toohey . He is supposed to represent socialism . He abhors individual success but wants the society to flourish on its own. He hates Howard and loves Peter. He loves his neice a lot. When it comes to his neice he is quite an individual.  He doesn't let her do anything she wants. He forces her to work for him and denies her the permission to go to college.

Then there is the great character Dominique Francon. She doesn't like society apparently. She talks in a mysterious way. And every damn man loves her. Every man proposes to her. She refuses each one of them . She apparently doesn;t feel anything for anybody and even uses all the men to her advantage. She uses everything part of society and refuses to acknowledge anything. Because she is Dominique , born with silver spoon and with lots lots lots of money. She has so much money that she goes for a retreat is Pittsburg (ancestral property) and lives with servants all around her to to take care of her.

After going through such polarised characters , I wondered where this story was going to . Then BOOM, It happens. Our Dominique meets the man of her dreams in a quarry(none other than Howard) . She falls for his muscles and body. They stare at each other. And before they have exchanged a hello, he comes to her at night and forces himself physically on her. And she LOVES it!.She wants it even more. He does the deed and leaves and she is purely satisfied that he is SATISFIED. What generosity.  He leaves and goes back to New York without informing her. He is an individual you see. She doesn't mind it . Because she is an individual too.

Howard finally gets work , oops sorry , finds someone who will let him work for  and gets a contract (Enright house) . Ms Francon meets Howard there again . They act as if they dont know each other(This is normal behaviour) . And in the night , she goes to his place and sleeps with him again. In the morning she does everything to malign Howard(through her News paper articles).  WHY ?  Even I dont know the answer. But Howard and Dominique know.  Because they know everything! Howard keeps saying this ("I know")  to everybody who tells him something.  How does he know everything? He KNOWS.  

Meanwhile our Dominique flirts with Peter and uses him thoroughly. You see she wants to destroy Howard , so she praises Peter to heights so that world notices Peter and hates Howard. Ms Dominique thinks she is the only one who is playing this brilliant game. How she underestimates the world!

Even Elsworth Toohey hates Howard. So he joins with Ms Francon to destroy him. Ms Francon meanwhile continues play Ms Hyde at night. Toohey makes Howard build a temple of humanity through his friend. Howard poor fellow, for the first time doesn;t KNOW. He hires a sculptor by name Steve Mallory and builds the temple. Ms Francon poses nude for the statue to be built in the temple. This is done at night . So NOBODY from the press can ever find that Howard and Ms Francon are having an affair. They are smarter than British Spies. The temple is built and Toohey in his article rejects the temple as an insult to religion!   There is a court case and Howard loses it but stands by his work. Ms Francon , who still wants to act(God knows why) gives a testimony against Howard during the trial.

Ms Francon is so upset that she goes to Peter Keating and asks him to marry her. She even tells him that , it is his last chance to HAVE HER. Peter has no choice(or did he have?)  but to marry her. That too on her terms. Ms Francon marries the puppy sorry Peter and as soon as the marriage is done , she goes to Howard to sleep with him again.  He sleeps . And afterwards she tells him that she has married Peter. Howard offers to marry her if she can take a annulment( so these two great people belive in marriage now???? when they can live-in?) . She says no(dont ask me Why, even I dont know) and goes back to Peter. Howard says that he will wait for her! Why wait dear? She will come to you even if she is married. !

After this , I STOPPED reading the book. I was so disgusted by Howard, felt so pukish when I thought of Ms Francon' character that I couldn't go on further!.

I do not want to Judge anybody  but such inconsistencies in characters? One moment you give lectures on society ,hating society and then you use the same society to the hilt(Ms Francon).

You talk about individualism , work , about not taking help from anyone and yet you dont respect others individualism?  You build a house where YOU would live in with other's expenses?  You force yourself on women and walk away without regret? You should be jailed for it( Mr Howard).

I am sorry , I think I am not so strong hearted to read the book. I saw somewhere in a review that Ms Francon marries Gail Wynad (leaving Peter, thank God) and leaves him and fianlly marries Howard. What mockery of institution of marriage.  What a mockery of lower classes.  What a mockery of colleges.

The dialogues are also told as if the main characters know everything. This is sickening. Howard is NOT GOD.  He is a human and yet he makes humans look so small through his talk, work.

Sorry , I dont think I will every complete the book.

World Cup 2015 : Australia vs Rest of the world

Another world cup comes to an end.  Except six matches all the matches were one sided. The domination coming from the bat. But if you see at the end, the real winners were bowlers! The team which bowled well (batting is expected thanks to the batting tracks) finally won the world cup.  The whole Australian win can be summed up in two names which sound the same. Yes you got it, Mitchell Starc and Mitchell Jhonson.  Pakistan had the bowlers who could swing but unfortunately their team doesn't work in unision.   The rest of the teams showed bowling brilliance in spurts but not consistently. Tim Southee , Trent Boult  performed well but did not perform on the most crucial day!

Mitchell Starc had come with a plan for Brendon and boom ! Executed to perfection!  Captains can make thousand plans, it is the players who need to execute the plan. Starc rose to the occasion many times and saved Australia. Even in the match against NZ in knock out stage , it was Starc who gave Australia a glimmer of hope to win (Their batsmen had failed!) . Hats off to him.  Congrats to team Australia , they have shown to the world that it is planning , execution which matters. Extreme passion for the game wont help unless you perform on the field with precision.


In NZ and SA match , that is what seemed to happen. SA seemed to be all over the place in the last ten overs. They missed all their golden chances , thanks to their fixation with the result. If they had just given merit to each moment of the game instead of thinking of the result , it would have been good.  But one thing is for sure, there was not one person in the world who would not have cried seeing AB, Morkel cry. They deserved better :(.


In India and Australia match , it was totally one -sided. What shocked me was not that India lost. But with the way India went about the whole game. They  seemed to have resigned to fate the moment the toss was won by Australia. They way they chased the target was very poor. Dhon1 was the only man left whom India could rely on. First the bowlers disappointed him and next the batsmen .  But of course India should be given credit for performing well throughout the tournament , given that they had lost a test series, tri series in the same conditions.  I only wish they had tried harder in terms of planning etc. Maybe they did and could not execute it.  But Team India , you made us proud :)

All in all , the world cup was good.  Till next time then . In the British Isles.

Here is a link to make you laugh( It is unrealtimes)

http://www.theunrealtimes.com/2015/03/27/comic-rahul-dravid-trolls-nasser-hussain-again/

The last day

Another semester ends. Another batch moves on.  Sigh!  But at the end of it all , I feel as if I could have done much better . But it was difficult for me to get myself motivated because my students were not so into the subject. Which is ok because not everyone gets moved by literature. But here are my observations(no judgement) of my experiences with the current student generation.

• Students are  constantly distracted by their phones that they hardly listen to the class. Which reduces their productivity by half. Because of which their attention span is only half an hour.
• Once the students get used to scoring low marks , they continue the trend with a resigned attitude. 
• All the students just aim for pass marks and nothing higher than that! 
• The only motivating factor for  the students to attend the classes is attendance percentage. 
• Sometimes company of friends may distract you to no end. It is better to stay away from such company.
• They  write assignments sorry copy assignments. Clearly assignments is futile concept . Why not adopt innovative teaching methods?
• All the students lose continuity of the classes because they attend one class and dont come the next class.
• Testing them only makes them run away more college . They DO NOT want to be tested.
•  Even if they attend the test , they are totally OK with giving away blank sheets. How is this possible.
• I tried open book test. Even that failed.
• Even if they are interested in the class , it need not translate to marks.

What students really want.

• I feel students want more chance of expressing themselves in the class.
• If the class is one way they tend to lost interest.
• They want more media .
• They are interested in innovative methods of teaching.(at least it catches their attention)

All in all for me some students made all the difference. They came up with such lovely ideas and thoughts that I was bowled and believed that India is in safe hands. 

I wish them all the best! Our education system needs a re-visit. 

God of Small Things

I finally read Arundhati Roy's "The God of Small Things".  The book was very very engaging although it was going back and forth in time. And Roy doesnt inform us which time zone she is in. Which is Ok. Because this switching back and forth created some sort of suspense and building of a crescendo for the reader to look forward to. They keep talking about the "incident". We dont know what. We know that. this "incident" caused  the death of a small girl Sophie. It is her funeral the story starts with . 

The story itself runs on the multiple themes. Roy jam packs mutiple problems ( We face in Indian society) into  one single book and she is quiet successful in pushing her thoughts across to the readers. The first theme she  has worked on is the rules of Love. According to her Love does not know whom to love and how much to love. Love just loves.  This love she shows between the twins and  their mom's love for Velutha.  Rahel and Esthappen are nonidentical twins  and their mom Ammu is a rebel.   Velutha belongs to a so-called lower caste and Ammu a Syrian Christian.  They both fall in love and consequence of which the little girl Sophie faces.  Sophie is Ammu's brother's daughter.  Ammu's brother Chacko and Baby Kochamma(Ammu's aunt) blame Ammu and her kids for their recklessness and indirectly hold them responsible for Sophie's death.  

This scar remains with Esthappen for ever , so much that he never speaks again. Rahel feels lonely. Ammu dies. 

The final  scene is how the twins become one again through their consummation. They both assuage each others souls that way. 

The second theme is a political one with lots of communism in it . It typically depicts Kerala of of 1960s. How Velutha ( a communist) is not given any support when he needs by his own mentor is haunting. Velutha's fate is sealed with this act of his mentor.

The book has many descriptions. And I will be very honest here, I was not able to comprehend everything. I  would definitely want to know what Roy meant. 

Roy's depiction of Kerala is beautiful. I could constant feel the wetness of the rain and the back waters of Kerala :).

I also want to ask Roy one more question. Was consummation the only way for Esthappen to get peace? Was there no other way?  Did Ammu have to suffer so much? She was a rebel. She could have found another job and looked after her children well. Why listen to Baby Kochamma and "return" Estha?

All in all the book was a fine read. 

Few people I admire

There are some people whom I have always admired

First  is AR Rahman. His music is amazing no doubt. He is world class. But what makes him stand apart from the rest is his heart. What a human being he is. Wherever he goes he spreads love. His speeches are all about love and nothing else.  They are hardly about music. Somehow I feel , for him music just a medium to reach God. And when he composes music with such a good intention , only the best will come out .  He is always smiling, humble and most of all looks like a normal person. I never feel he is a star. He has won an Oscar(which we Indians feel is the benchmark for achievement)  and yet I never see any swagger in him . To see what I mean look at this video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cuFk8LvRJvU

He  downplays the whole oscar thing and convinces us that music is great everywhere . He requests his fans not to abuse anybody nor spread hatred. What a man!

Second one is Sachin Tendulkar : His  farewell speech tells all about this little gentleman of cricket. Not once have  I seen him behave in a snooty way. His extraordinary work in helping the cancer patients shows what a great human he is . His simple , unassuming way of speaking has bowled me over. In his farewell speech, he makes sure to pass the message that he has not got there alone. He thanks all the important people of his life . Hats off Sachin. You  are indeed India's gem.

Third is Bill Gates. I mean that man never gives up! Whatever you say about Microsoft, it is still used extensively. And Bill Gates is the sole reason. But what is Bill Gates known for now. He has surpassed his previous entrepreneur skill to become the biggest philanthropist we know now. He is still relentlessly pursuing the Ebola virus spread and is spreading awareness all over the world. His silent visits to India (When media is reporting if Kim K's visa is approved or not) is a testimony of his honesty and genuineness.

I also admire the Army,Navy and Air Force who are protecting our country day and night. When we lose a loved one , we cant get over it for life. And yet when we hear the headlines like " three BSF jawans killed"  , for us it is merely a number. How callous of us. Each Jawan is a human being who had the guts to choose this profession and stand  at the border and protect our country. Each Jawan has a family. He has children too. But we downplay their lives so easily. Here is my respect to each and every one of them . Without you we are nothing.

WHY?

YOU brought me into this world

Full of promises and dreams

Of lovely sunrises , blooming flowers

Of growing tall and growing strong

YOU made me believe that love exists

That Humanity drives this world

That being good is what I must  do

That giving pain to others is wrong

YOU sent me to school to learn

Geography,History, English

To Play , to make friends

To build the future of my country

BUT when I saw those EYES

MY dreams VANISHED

HE asked me for my blood

To quench his thirst of REVENGE

I gave it away and I saw his EYES

Those EYES I had seen somewhere

They were YOURS

YOU showed me rainbow near the horizon

YOU let me feel the warm SUN

YOU let me experience LOVE

YOU gave me PARENTS

Then YOU asked me come to YOU

YOU watched me drown in the deep sea

THEY did it but it was YOU

WHY?  What is YOUR plan?

Where is the world going to?

I feel tired..really really tired. Tired of watching news all around the world which are giving the same news. People are dying. The only difference is that their nationalities change. An Indian dies here, an Australian dies there. But everything means the same to me. People are dying. Innocent people who have nothing to do with any conflict are dying. What could be the purpose of all these. Why should anybody die just because another person has decided to kill another person (for whatever reason). Why?

If I meet God today I will only ask him these questions and if he has answer to these then I will believe that something positive will come out of all these

God , what is your purpose on earth. People are  saying you are the reason for the fights. Why  are you not saying anything?

God, how can you watch children die?

God, when a women is being tortured , where are you? Cant you hear her voice?

God, using your name people are looting money from innocent people. Who is to blame for this.

God, how can anybody abuse someone from the same family? How can such thoughts come to a person.


God you are the main reason why this world still sane but are you the same reason why the world is going insane?


Last but not the least. When will all this end?

These are sincere questions.

For the Jane Austen in Us

For the Jane Austen in usJane Austen’s 239^th birth anniversary is coming up. (Dec 14^th 2014) and almost two centuries later, she is still one of the bestsellers!. I read my first Jane Austen at the age of sixteen and got hooked. She has written only few books (Six to be precise, the seventh one was left unfinished, what a pity!)  but what a mark they have left. Why do we love her so much? What is that “thing” which gets us read her so much?  After much thought I realised that it is not one but several factors which make her the most lovable author till this day. I think her works are so relevant to this date owing to many common factors of her book and the present society we live in .Let me list them down and see if you also think so?

•  Gold-digging mothers looking for rich grooms: Ok in India this is the case. A rich groom is what the bride’s mother dreams of.  The number of houses he has, the cars he owns, the number of times he has visited a “foreign” land.  Mrs Bennette matches this character perfectly so do our modern mothers. This character is from “Pride and Prejudice” who steals the show with her “gold-digging” indexJ.

 

• The gossiping neighbourhood Aunty:  Jane Austen books are replete with these characters be it in “Persuasion”,”Sense and Sensibility” or “Pride and Prejudice”. The Aunts rule the gossip market by passing news between houses and becoming the modern “Indian Breaking news channel”. Jane Austen nailed this character to perfection!. Be it Mrs Philip from P&P or Mary from Persuasion or even Emma from Emma , all of the characters thrived on gossip. Hail gossip.

   

• The Strong and Silent M&B hero: Jane Austen can be named as the official founder of M&B and Harlequin because her leading men just fit the bill perfectly of a Harlequin hero. Name one lady/girl who doesn’t swoon when they hear the name Darcy?  Colonel Brandon of Sense and Sensibility, Knightly of Emma, Captain Wentworth of Persuasion all are trademark heroes of Romance novelsJ. Darcy is the strong silent type who has a heart of a gold(his housekeeper tells Lizzy when she visits Pemberly). He is not the flirting kind who falls for beauty alone. He wants brains and wit in a girl.  What a character! Wentworth from Persuasion  gives into ego and ignores Anne only to lose the battle at the end. All beautiful characters making the swoon meter hit the maximum for girls like us.

•  Plane Jane heroine /Girl Next door:  Plain Jane character is a famous one till date.  Many a stories have been written with that theme. The plain girl with ordinary looks, with her exemplary character manages to attract the leading man and ends up happily ever after.  I think Anne of Persuasion is the best the instance of it. Anne loses her bloom very early in her life but with her elegance, maturity and sensibility rises above everybody. Mr Wentworth cannot help himself but to fall in love with her all over again!  This theme has been used umpteen times in movies/books/tv dramas. Jane Austen , take a bow . Your stock characters are still alive!

• Dancing and Music and parties:  Dance and Music are integral part of Jane Austen’s novels.  Major love stories of her have started in a ball, a card party or dinner parties.  And so is the case even today! Dance and Music is part of every love story till date Romance quotient rises with it and we have to thank Ms Austen for paving the way!

•  Woman of Substance: All of Jane Austen heroines have a mind of their own. They belonged to the Victorian era (which was conservative of times) and yet the heroines had the guts to express what they feel like. Apart from Mansfield Park heroine, all the rest were witty, bold, sensible and of course unconventional. Anne of Persuasion seems submissive but actually she is not. She opposes her status conscious father strongly to be with her poor friend belonging to lower strata.  Elizabeth oF P&P plainly disapproves Lady DeBorough and even goes to the extent of boldly telling her that she wouldn’t mind being engaged to Mr Darcy. That’s our girl!

• Status and position in society: Titles and status played a major role in Jane Austen’s books (which probably reflected the Victorian era). A Baronet looked down upon common people. Why, even Darcy (who is owns Pemberly estate in P&P) openly tells Lizzy (while proposing to her) that “despite her family’s status in society” he is ready to go down and ask her for marriage (No wonder Lizzy turns him down!) Status still plays a big role in our present world isn’t it? Poor girl rich guy or rich guy poor girl combo is still looked with a shock!

• Extended families: Extended families provide all “extra” drama we need to spice up a novel and Austen has pioneered in that art. All her books deal with huge families(cousins,uncles,aunts,neighbours) and their stories  are interwoven with the main story in such a logical fashion that nothing seems out of place.  It is like one organic plant.And for that reason alone we need to bow to Ms Austen. Our current soaps deal with such families but alas not to the same effect as Ms Austen.  They could surely learn something from her.

The list goes on.  Her foresight, her exemplary observation of the society around her, her understanding of human emotions and relations is above par. Jane Austen continues to enthrall us for the sole reason that she made stories of real human emotions which have not changed till date.   #Respect #Brilliant  for our dear Jane Austen.

Stop these Bollywood cliches

Bollywood we had had enough. We do not want to see these cliches (post-2000)  anymore
1. Stop portraying women as skimpily clad girls with lots gusto in the beginning only to end up at the end again as doormat. ( Ex-Cocktail(Deepika's character, Ishaqzaade(Parineeti's character)

2.Being loud and boisterous and "in your face" attitude is not equal to being modern woman.

3. Make 3D movies for the heck of it with no purpose. (Dangerous Ishq)

4. Try use graphics,technology and what not which clearly look third rate and then claim to have made the best technological film ever.

5. Girl who is modern can wear salwar kameez and sarees.

6. Bollywood heroines giving lectures on obejectification in real life and getting objectified in reel life.

7. Use media to advantage for film promotion, self promotion , brand promotion and what not and then blaming media for intruding into their lives. Letting them "intrude" for your convenience is as sickening.

8. Lifting, copying stories,scenes,action sequences,songs,dance moves is WRONG. STOP IT.

9.  Looting people with exorbitant ticket rates. No wonder you are earning in crores. But for this the people are to be blamed.

10. Its ok to show girls as coy and shy  because real life does have these kind of girls.

I don't know Phil Hughes personally and yet......

I don't know Phil Hughes personally. I don't what records you have broken  or were you really good at cricket. But when I heard about your  death yesterday my heart went heavy. I still feel heavy. I feel heavy with the thought that you didn't want to leave this world. That you wanted to do much more in life and you could have. That you  chose this sport with lot of braveness and courage. Feel heavy with pain thinking about his parents. Nothing can be more painful than seeing your child pass away before you.
God's way of working is quiet confusing at times. Otherwise he wouldn't have done this.But God has been merciful in the fact that Phil Hughes never regained consciousness after being hit. At least he didn't go through any pain and was not aware of what was happening to his brain. But God ,please show more kindness in giving strenghth to his parents so that they cope  with the loss. That their restless souls gets some peace and then Phil Hughes will rest in peace.

Investing in a relation

Today we are living in such a cynical world. We are questioning every relationship we have. We hardly trust anybody. Forget others , we sometimes don't trust ourselves!  We aremso into this "marketing"  jargons that everything is give and take policy. The problem is we all want to take first and then give. And when everybody thinks this way, there can only be a deadlock! Each is waiting for the other to give and finally none get anything. All  they get is  a let down feeling.  But this can change! It can change if one tries to give first and then see if we can anything is return!  

This can happen only if we genuinely invest in relationships. The problem with today's world is nobody has the time to do so.  And what is even more funny , one who gives importance to family relations is considered a foolish person letting go of their individuality. Who the hell told you so? 

Time and again it has been proven that , a family with good relations is a happy family. Not a family with greatest riches, nor a family with greatest academicians. We all keep working hard individually with happiness as the end goal. If we can get the happiness with great relations all around, why not invest more time into it?

Before I get into investing into a relationship, I do not mean fake messages on FB  or false smiley faces on WhatsApp. They are not in my terms building a relationship.  A true relationship is built gradually. It is built with lots of work from our side.  This process may take years. But it is definitely worth it. A solid relationship at the end of four years will give you lifelong happiness. And happiness is our goal right?  When we keep thinking about , what am I getting in return, or what will I get in return , then we get into the selfish mode. First give it a try. Try hard, Give hundred percent. Even after your trials, the relationship is not working , then it was probably not worth it. But first give it a TRY. 

The most ignored relations of our world are our own families. We assume , mom is always there. We believe dad will bail us out. Work hard in maintaining a good relation with your family. Small gestures, a smile, listening to your family member will go a long way in building a relation. A hug, a pat on a shoulder, a good laugh  all these things matter. Going home and asking mom about her day will cheer her up. Asking your brother about his exams or the latest game he has will bring a smile to his face. If these things don't come naturally to us then we must do it consciously. It is not being fake. It is being more sensitive. Hard work always pays. And this hard work will also pay. It will pay you in happiness. 

When we pass away , nobody talks about our designation we passed away with. People only think about how we were as a person. They say "He was a good man, she was a helpful lady, he was always polite". Nobody will talk about our riches. They will only talk about our richness as a person . This richness can only come from how we have built our relationship with the rest of the world. So time has come to start investing! Where to start? Start with your mom :)

This is how I would change the Humsafar Ending

Are you all watching Humsafar ?  Let us say this, if you are a woman and if you have not seen Fawad Khan yet , then something doesn't sound right. That's right ladies, the swoon meter hits the max with Fawad Khan. But his looks aside, I feel there are many things which make "Humsafar" a memorable watch.  The lead couple did such a wonderful job that we almost believe that Khirad and Asher are real life couple!  The amazing chemistry between the two, their good looks ,  their acting and of course all the sweet romantic moments between the two make the serial a hit.  The story itself is not that great because it lacks originality. Any girl who has grown up on Mills and Boon diet can tell the story backward! Yep it is that predictable.  What I really like about the serial is that it actually has a ending , unlike our great soaps which go on and on for years with wafer thin plots. So we must take this as a cue and start doing something similar here.

Although the serial is very good, I feel the way they rushed the ending was not correct. They jam packed all the accusations, redemption, apologies in one last episode. Somehow Khirad forgiving Asher in one scene seemed almost ridiculous. Here is a lady who has suffered hardships for four years and the sole reason for her hardships was this man Asher who simply didn't trust his wife. He believed every tom , dick and harry but his wife! How can any woman forgive such a man in one scene?  Second absurd thing was the coincidence of Asher eavesdropping on his mom's conversation. He reading Khirad's letter and immediately listening to his mom's conversation with Khizar seemed too stretched.  Asher, goes back to pick Khirad but hardly opens his mouth. He says , Hareem wants her mom and that's why he has come here.Hello? You  came to know the biggest truth of your life. Is this the way you react?

So here is the way I would have ended the serial if I were the director/writer.

1. When Khizar comes to Asher to confess his mistake and expose Asher's mom , I would have made Asher listen to him. This would have two-fold effect. Asher , who is already missing Khirad , would have had heart melt to listen to anybody who can absolve Khirad of her sins. And he listening to Khizar would have made the audience have a soft corner for him. And yes Khizar still deserves that slap he gets from Asher. So the slap stays !

2. After this Asher goes straight to Khirad and ask for an apology and asks her to come back with him. She disagrees and blames him for all her miseries and tells him that she can never forgive him. Asher promises her that he will never try to get close to her again, till she agrees to take him back.But for the sake of Hareem , let them both stay together at least. This way Hareem wont miss her mum and dad. Asher goes down on his knees and begs her to forgive him and come back. At this point I would make Khirad agree to come back , but not forgive Asher.

3. Asher takes Khirad back to the house, where he has the confrontation scene with his mom. I would keep the scene as it is , except for the part where he says that he would have divorced his wife , if his mom had told so.(Why should he do that anyway?)

4. After the scene, Khirad,Asher and Hareem leave the house to stay in another house. Asher's mom doesnt become mad , but ,yes, regrets her behaviour.

5. Asher tries his best to make Hareem and Khirad happy with his actions. 

6. Asher discusses his jealousy and the way  he behaved before 4 years. His actions were blinded by jealousy and hence he is suffering now. If only he had trusted her this wouldn;t have happened.  He then confesses to her that , he always felt she was too good for him. And that's why he believed that she would leave him! If only he believed her love. 

7. Khirad is seen slowly softening her stand towards Asher though some scenes. Like , if Asher falls sick, she still cares for him

8. Khirad also realises that she still loves him and forgives him.

9. All is well that ends well.

So how is my story?

Karnataka Rajyostsava Day

The yellow and red colours fluttering in the wind , in every street of Karnataka can only mean one thing. Yes , Karnataka Rajyotsava day!  Every year , on November  1 , people of Karnataka and all the the kannada speaking people around the world come together to celebrate the birth of Karnataka.  Let us see some interesting  facts about this special day.

History

The state of Karnataka was formed on Nov 1 , 1956 , when all the Kannada speaking regions were merged to form one unified state. Did you know that, Aluru Venkata Rao  , was the first person who actually  came up with this idea of unifying all the Kannada regions into one in the year 1905!  He definitely was a visionary, because his vision did come true and we are enjoying the fruits of his vision now.  In 1956, Mysore state, North Karnataka, Canara were merged to form the new state. An interesting trivia is that, when the regions were merged into a state, the whole state was named Mysore and not Karnataka! It was only in the year 1973 that our state was renamed to Karnataka. Sri Devaraj Urs was the Chief Minister at the time.

How the day is celebrated by Government of Karnataka

This day is probably as famous as any festival of the state. All the people come together and celebrate it lots of happiness and pride. Government of Karnataka organises a procession on this day . Rajyostsava awards are given away on this day. The recipients of the award come from various walks of life. Just like republic day, tableaux of Goddess Bhuvaneswari Devi is decorated and presented.  Cultural events are followed by this.

How the rest celebrate it?

Karnataka is probably the only state, where each and everybody residing in the state celebrates it. It is like a festival. Apartments (such as ours) come together and organise the function. Every autowallah, on this day has the red and yellow fluttering flag , clearly taking pride in the day.  On this day, every street of the state comes alive, with lights and colours! This is like a second Diwali for the state.  

Its Significance-Unifying the state

The most interesting part of the day is that people from all over the state, residing here come and join in the celebrations. It is this day, which lets them know about the history of the state and its significance. The day is not connected to any religion, caste or sect, which probably gives a deeper message to all of us. It is the celebration of unity in diversity.  It almost seems that this day is another way of bringing the whole state together and understand that staying together is the key to all the happiness in the society.

Now that we have seen, what this day is all about, which most of you would have known by now. Why don’t we see some interesting, unknown facts about Karnataka?  Let us see how well you know your KarnatakaJ. So here we go.

• Did you know that Kittur Rani Chennamma, queen of princely state of Kittur, was the first woman to fight against the British army , by leading an army herself?  It was way before Jhansi ki Rani . Her statue is in Indian Parliament complex!

• Karnataka Khadi Gramodyaga Samyukta Sangha in Hubli is the only place in India which is authorized to manufacture the Flag of India.

• M Viswesharaya’s(one of the greatest engineers of India)  birthday  , which is 15^th September is celebrated as Engineer’s day in India. He was the chief engineer of KRS Dam (Mysore) and even Mysore Soap factory.

•  What does Devanhalli  strike you? Airport? Actually it is the birth place to Tipu Sultan!

•  Of the 26 world heritage UNESCO sites in India , two of them are in Karnataka. One of them is at Hampi i.e the the statue of Ugranarsimha . The second heritage site is at Pattadkal . The monuments of Hampi and Pattadakal were made UNESCO sites in 1986 and 1987 respectively. Time to visit them?

• Did you know that Gandhi visited Karrnataka only once? This was during the Belgaum Congress session in 1924. At the time Gandhi was the president of Congress.

• The name “Karnataka”  is derived from “Karunadu” meaning high plateau due to its location on the deccan plain.

• Do you know that there are references to Karnataka in Mahabharata and Bhagavata Purana? In Bhagavata Purana it is described in Chapter 6 of Canto 5. It is said that Rishabhadeva ended his avatara in Kutakachala hill in Karnata province.  Kutakachala hill is in present day Kollur , Karnataka.
• Bangalore was the first city to receive electricity. Guess which building received the first spark?  The City Market building.
• Bangalore had almost 280 lakes and tanks.  Most for any city. Wonder what happened to them.
• The maximum number of Nobel Prize nominations from India (in Science) have come from Bangalore! Sir CV Raman got the Nobel Prize in 1930. He was associated with IISc Bangalore.

• Bangalore is higher altitude than Dehradun.  That’s why we all own such beautiful jackets!

• Now, time has come to change Bangalore to Bengaluru.  Do you know the origin of this name?  There are many theories behind it. One is that it came from the name “Benda Kaal Ooru(Town of Boiled beans). There is another one based on a tiny village called “Hale Bengaluru” (Old Bengaluru) which is present near the current Hebbal Lake. Either way we are happy!

Hope you all enjoyed this facts about Karnataka.  All the facts have been gathered from various sources on net and they need to be credited for them.

This sums it up!

"thing" and my kid

Ok , all the parents out there are very much aware of this. Every child/teenager today is hooked to "them". They are so much into it that they dont eat at dining tables anymore.They neither go down and play. They dont know the joy of watching sky or dont know what it means to feel the rain on their skin. Their tiny fingers are constantly fighting a losing battle with the "thing" in their hands. The "thing" is controlling them , the "thing" makes them feel high, the "thing" drives them. And I will be very honest, the "thing" is driving me crazy. I am not able to see my child becoming a slave to it. But when I deny my child what he craves for ,he is upset, he is constantly thinking about "it". His mind doesn't rest till I give him "that".  And it is upsetting me a lot. Where am I doing wrong? It is not as if I am not  giving him "that" at all. He gets it everyday for a specified amount of time but it doesn't satisfy him. He wants more.

What I noticed is that this is the case with every child whose parents can afford all those things. But most of them are able to give it to their child without any hesitation and I find some parents feel quiet proud about it also. 

I am sure you all know what I am talking about. Yep all the fancy gadgets which were created to make our life easier and sometimes I feel they have taken over our lives so much that we have reached a stage where we have become slaves to it. Is it good? Absolutely NO. But what hurts me most is that kids and teenager who do not know what is the limit are getting hurt in the process. Their creative side is getting stifled. Their social skills are getting trampled. Their physical activity is getting dwindled. They do not know what it is to hold a book and read. They dont know what is the joy of playing a board game. They dont know what it is to sit around a dining table and have food. 

But what is the solution to this? Cutting it completely off is not the solution ,I know. But letting them understand that there are other things in the world which require our attention is the need of the hour.

The big task is how? my answer is "I dont know". I feel quiet helpless in this situation but I will definitely come up with something and come back to this blog with an answer. I will take it as a challenge!

 Wish me luck.